(Wounded Knee Creek, SD) In the days following the Trump Administration's rare retreat from hosting its first 2020 campaign rally in Tulsa, OK, on June 19th, another event has been cancelled: a Washington Redskins practice day and Presidential appearance in South Dakota. Planning for the little known and very rare event began early in the forty-fifth President's term. While at one point Donald Trump had been a Buffalo Bills fan, even having unsuccessfully bid on buying the team in 2014, he has been heard saying, "What could be more American than the Redskins? I love them. They play right here in DC."
When asked why his administration had put pressure on the team to schedule a practice at the site of the Wounded Knee Massacre, a spokesperson responded, "We just, you know, sort of picked a place. It could have been anywhere. Look, Democrats are trying to make this out to be something that it isn't. They're trying to make it seem like this administration is somehow racist. That's just not true. No one loves inju- Native Americans as much as Donald Trump. Everyone knows that."
The Presidential Rally in Tulsa, the site of one of the single worst episodes in the nation's history with violence against minorities, was called a racist dog whistle by some critics, claiming that it was a (barely) tacit overture to white supremacists and other Donald Trump supporters. The location was not the only thing seen as problematic. This is especially true as protests and riots have, once again, ripped the nation apart along racial lines.
June 19th, or "Juneteenth," commemorates the day that the last slaves in the United States were freed from Galveston, TX, a full two months after the end of the Civil War. Again, critics of the President and his administration were quick to jump on this as problematic. In an unexpected turn of events, many of the President's supporters also claimed to have struggled with the timing of the campaign event.
"When we say, 'Make America Great Again, we mean it. There was a time when America was great. That time was basically right up until January 1st, 1863. We could own people. There's a reason that every time I tell some snowflake that he's gay for thinking that blue lives don't matter, I can say that I 'owned' him. It's a reference to when America wasn't courting Communism. Free Market - that's Capitalism - means that I can own people, sell smallpox blankets to the savages, whatever. That was when America was great. Juneteenth is a reference to the end of that glorious time. Seriously, and they wanted to have an event on that day? It's like a slap in the face. Now, we're getting back there. Corporate tax cuts mean that we can bring people to homelessness and starvation while making money on their labor and underpaying them in ways that are basically laughable, but can we own them? Actually own their physical personages? No. Not yet. When we're there, we'll be Great, again," commented an anonymous Donald Trump supporter and white nationalist, going by Tonald Drump, jr.
He went on to say, "Now, a bunch of namby pamby middle of the road folks are going to see this stuff as bad. So, you gotta do your time. Gotta play nice. They'll see how much better this is for everyone - it's the natural order of things. Well, we had to postpone the rally. We had to cancel the Redskins event. It's a shame. Do you have any idea how hard it is to get a professional football team to play in South Dakota? I mean, yeah, it's the Redskins, so they barely qualify, but still."
When asked about future events, Drump laughed, saying, "Yeah, try and find a date and place in the entire United States that isn't the site or anniversary of something we did to black or brown or red or yellow people. You won't."
Drump went onto speak about the superiority of the white race while unwittingly being the best argument against any and all of his own statements.
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